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Chemsex weekly email check-ins

How to check in with me weekly by email

Respond to following questions (copy & paste these questions & your responses into an email to me.)


1 Did you achieve your goals re chems use in the last 7 days?



2. How did you experience & manage your cravings in the last 7 days? What worked, what didn’t?





3. Do you plan to use chems in the coming seven days?


  • If Yes; what boundaries are in place? (Eg how long your session will last, what you will do, what you won’t, etc.) (see harm reduction info)

  • If No; How confident are you to accomplish this goal (scale 1= not confident; 10= very confident)

  • If No; How important to you is it to accomplish this goal (scale 1= not important; 10= very important)


4. What is it keeping you motivated to accomplish this goal?





5. What are the most vulnerable moments/times in the coming 7 days? When should you be expecting the strongest cravings? What could go ‘wrong’ with your plan?


  • After work Fridays

  • Weekday mornings

  • Sat late afternoon (no plans)

  • Bed time weekdays, can’t sleep

  • Travelling home after work

  • Sat night, alone

  • Sat night

  • dinner/drinks with friends

  • Sunday mornings, breakfast time

  • Sunday mid morning, no plans

  • Sunday afternoon, bored

  • Sunday late afternoon, after a busy day

  • Late night Sat, can’t sleep


See a video playlist on these topics 




6. What are your triggers? What sets off cravings for you? (Tick all that apply; or see video suggestions)


  • When I’m alone

  • After drinking alone

  • When out drinking with friends

  • After clubbing

  • When playing online/on Apps – no specific plans

  • When returning to London from a trip

  • After a fight with a friend/family member/partner

  • When I feel lonely & miss intimacy

  • When I feel bored

  • When I feel stressed and anxious

  • When I feel horny

  • When I feel depressed

  • When I feel angry at myself, someone else, or at life.

  • When I get unexpected correspondence/an invitation to party

  • Returning home alone after a night out

  • Returning home to partner after a night out

  • After an unsatisfactory sex encounter

  • After being rejected online

  • Whenever I feel like celebrating

  • Whenever I feel I deserve a reward for “being good”


See a video playlist on these topics 




7. What can you do differently next time you feel a craving or trigger? (Tick all that apply; or see video suggestions)


  • Leave the room/place I’m in

  • Call a friend/supportive person

  • Clean the house/do gardening

  • Write a letter/journal note to yourself

  • Record a video message to yourself on your phone, to remind yourself of consequences

  • Go to gym/do exercise

  • Cook a favourite meal

  • Practice meditation/mindfulness

  • Watch a favourite (distracting) film or box-set

  • Have a (distracting) activity ready for just these moments; make a list of these

  • Get offline/close the App/

  • Take a deep breath; smile.

  • Turn off any pornography

  • Masturbate (quickly) Then occupy yourself off line

  • Continue breathing. Take in your surroundings

  • Take a shower

  • Tell someone how I’m feeling

  • Change the mood/music/lighting/temperature

  • Go to the local shop. Buy chocolate. Ask shopkeeper how his day was

  • Put favourite music in your ears. Go for a walk

  • Be with people who care/value you

  • Take a deep breath: smile. Continue breathing. Take in your surroundings

  • Call a friend/supportive person

  • Create a list of things you want to do this week

  • Think about what you’ll be doing two days from now – if you use, if you don’t.

  • Watch a YouTube playlist that helps you deal with cravings

  • Change your emotional state somehow. Be creative.


See a video playlist on these topics 

Copy & paste these questions and your responses into an email to me)

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