David Stuart


Chemsex weekly email check-ins

How to check in with me weekly by email

Respond to following questions (copy & paste these questions & your responses into an email to me.)

1 Did you achieve your goals re chems use in the last 7 days?



2. How did you experience & manage your cravings in the last 7 days? What worked, what didn’t?




3. Do you plan to use chems in the coming seven days?

  • If Yes; what boundaries are in place? (Eg how long your session will last, what you will do, what you won’t, etc.) (see harm reduction info)
  • If No; How confident are you to accomplish this goal (scale 1= not confident; 10= very confident)
  • If No; How important to you is it to accomplish this goal (scale 1= not important; 10= very important)


4. What is it keeping you motivated to accomplish this goal?




5. What are the most vulnerable moments/times in the coming 7 days? When should you be expecting the strongest cravings? What could go ‘wrong’ with your plan?

  • After work Fridays
  • Weekday mornings
  • Sat late afternoon (no plans)
  • Bed time weekdays, can’t sleep
  • Travelling home after work
  • Sat night, alone
  • Sat night
  • dinner/drinks with friends
  • Sunday mornings, breakfast time
  • Sunday mid morning, no plans
  • Sunday afternoon, bored
  • Sunday late afternoon, after a busy day
  • Late night Sat, can’t sleep

 See a video playlist on these topics


6. What are your triggers? What sets off cravings for you? (Tick all that apply; or see video suggestions)

  • When I’m alone
  • After drinking alone
  • When out drinking with friends
  • After clubbing
  • When playing online/on Apps – no specific plans
  • When returning to London from a trip
  • After a fight with a friend/family member/partner
  • When I feel lonely & miss intimacy
  • When I feel bored
  • When I feel stressed and anxious
  • When I feel horny
  • When I feel depressed
  • When I feel angry at myself, someone else, or at life.
  • When I get unexpected correspondence/an invitation to party
  • Returning home alone after a night out
  • Returning home to partner after a night out
  • After an unsatisfactory sex encounter
  • After being rejected online
  • Whenever I feel like celebrating
  • Whenever I feel I deserve a reward for “being good”

 See a video playlist on these topics


7. What can you do differently next time you feel a craving or trigger? (Tick all that apply; or see video suggestions)

  • Leave the room/place I’m in
  • Call a friend/supportive person
  • Clean the house/do gardening
  • Write a letter/journal note to yourself
  • Record a video message to yourself on your phone, to remind yourself of consequences
  • Go to gym/do exercise
  • Cook a favourite meal
  • Practice meditation/mindfulness
  • Watch a favourite (distracting) film or box-set
  • Have a (distracting) activity ready for just these moments; make a list of these
  • Get offline/close the App/
  • Take a deep breath; smile.
  • Turn off any pornography
  • Masturbate (quickly) Then occupy yourself off line
  • Continue breathing. Take in your surroundings
  • Take a shower
  • Tell someone how I’m feeling
  • Change the mood/music/lighting/temperature
  • Go to the local shop. Buy chocolate. Ask shopkeeper how his day was
  • Put favourite music in your ears. Go for a walk
  • Be with people who care/value you
  • Take a deep breath: smile. Continue breathing. Take in your surroundings
  • Call a friend/supportive person
  • Create a list of things you want to do this week
  • Think about what you’ll be doing two days from now – if you use, if you don’t.
  • Watch a YouTube playlist that helps you deal with cravings
  • Change your emotional state somehow. Be creative.

Copy & paste these questions and your responses into an email to me)